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Comment on: Re: How do you explain the divorce rate in the U.S.?

Bigthink — Sun, 16 Mar 2008 23:37:01 +0100

Wow thats surprising his wife plays that "me" card too. But didnt god make this whole world for just them? oh thats what it is God is the missing part. so what about those statistics that show that christians have a higher divorce rate than other religous groups and non-religious people being at the lowest? I guess that god plan has its own set of issues huh.

Comment on: Re: How do you explain the divorce rate in the U.S.?

Bigthink — Tue, 26 Feb 2008 05:20:40 +0100

A marriage is not created by a wedding, but by two people in an ongoing day by day negotiation. It must either evolve or die. In any relationship there are small instances where we must forgive and marriage is no different. In the big instances, we learn to rely on others outside for our support. We bring outsiders' strength in and it freshens what we have with our spouse. But we must also fiercely protect our marriages from bad influences. In our current culture, we don't want to take on any of this. We are too busy going here and there instead of being there for each other. We aren't there for our children, either. I agree there has to be a third party (ie, God) in times of duress. In days past, the general community was the third party because you were shamed by everyone if you could not work it out. And we have this funny idea about marital happiness... We have it all backwards. Happiness is not something you are entitled to GET from your partner, it is something to GIVE. This means you must find it within yourself first. Then it is multiplied when you give and receive it.

Comment on: Re: How do you explain the divorce rate in the U.S.?

Bigthink — Tue, 05 Feb 2008 15:51:21 +0100

Being a self-centred generation is definitely one of the main factors for the high divorce rate. The idea that there a bigger things than the individual holds true as well, in my opinion.

With this in mind, applying criticism to a divorced couple because of their selfishness is confusing to me. We all have a basic responsibility to ourselves to be happy. Emancipating oneself from a most harrowing situation, an unhappy marriage, seems selfish. It is also the correct decision in the long run for all parties.

The secularisation of the West has de-stigmatised divorce in principle. This is another obvious factor in the increased divorce rate. As for Mr. Warren's reference to the role of God and the "triangle", well, it sounded like religo-rhetoric to me.

Marriage is a most personal situation and therefore any decision must weigh personal impact as the most important factor, above all other factors.